Your suitcase is packed. Half full of insect repellent, shark repellent, and any other repellent you could find to fight off the death wave of creepy creatures that you’ve heard await your arrival. You’ve gotten half drunk or swallowed the most powerful black market sleeping pill you could get your hands on – you know the flight is going to be long and you’ve prayed to God the fat guy you saw in the waiting lounge won’t be sitting next to you.

He is sitting next to you- unlucky.

It will all be worth it. Just push through the lack of sleep, the entertainment system with faulty sound, the unwanted stopover and accompanying loss of all sense of time, turbulence and the screaming child two rows ahead.

Sunshine, sandy beaches, a cold beer and that Australian lifestyle you’ve dreamt about in dreary old wherever-you-came-from, will be your reward.

So You’re Going To Sydney.

What kind of travel book is this? Well, it’s no Lonely Planet. If you were to walk into a bar and take up a stool next to a stranger who happened to be a born and bred Sydneysider, and you asked him, “So, handsome stranger, tell me about Sydney.” Well assuming he’s not drunk, some sort of unsociable arsehole and all too willing to talk to you, this travel guide is that conversation.

This is Sydney as told through the lens of one very opinionated, genuine Sydneysider.

At the very least you’ll come away with a travel guide that can be used to flatten a spider or substitute for a drink coaster, but at most you will have a sense of what to expect when you arrive in Sydney, where to go while you’re here and what to see and do.

The harbour city awaits.

Kay Ryan