The EQ Edge

The other key aspect of this leadership style is that these leaders were driven by the past. They looked at the past to guide their future. What seemed to work before should continue to work again. This of course supports the need to be consistent—but at the cost of being unable to take advantage of new technologies, the changing economy, and the shifts in what the customer desires.

“There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other.”

power of empathy is that if you can grasp what another person is thinking and feeling—even if it differs wildly from your own perspective—and put your comprehension into words, the other person feels understood.3 This offsets any degree of tension that exists between the two of you and forges a strong bond of collaboration that helps you get what you want: to solve problems and create successful interpersonal relationships.

Too often we think that developing a relationship means that we have to talk a lot, impress others with our achievements, let the world know of our past accomplishments and future dreams. Not so. That behavior risks us being experienced as braggarts, interested only in ourselves. As one CEO jokingly told me, “God gave us two ears and one mouth as a message to listen at least twice as much as we talk!”

when it comes to the information people take in, he concluded that people retain 7 percent of the words spoken, 38 percent tone of voice, and 55 percent body language.

self-actualization means being where you want to be, in work and in all the varied aspects of your personal life.